So like I said last week, that power rankings shit was way too long and I would probably be late every week if I tried to keep up with that. So we're gonna try something a little more simple that will still get the point across. Who's starting to trend, and who's on the mend? Fucking genius, right? It only took me all of this past week to come up with. Anyways, we're gonna go over which teams are trending on their way up, and which ones are starting to expose themselves as the bottom tier teams. Let's start with some positivity.
Starting to Trend
1. Indianapolis Colts
Biases aside, the Colts are looking pretty good this year. Even with Anthony Richardson on IR, I still think they can pull off some wins for the foreseeable future. Turns out, they have probably the best depth at running back as well. Zack Moss is a fucking beast and JT will get right soon enough. Minshew Mania is here, so ya'll better buckle the fuck up and get ready for some gritty football. Zaire Franklin is also a top 5 linebacker in the league, Derrick Henry tried to be Derrick Henry (per usual) and Zaire shut that shit down. Gotta love it. Shane Steichen is building something special in Indy, and I'm all the way here for it. They gotta beat the Jags this weekend to fully convince me though.
2. Cincinnati Bengals
Okay, so I ranked these guys low as fuck last week, and that's only because they were playing like a low-ranked team. This past Sunday though, they looked like themselves again. Joe Burrow was actually able to move more than five inches, and Jamarr Chase was "always fuckin open". The defense also held their weight this week, forcing the Cardinals to make poor decisions. The Bengals are always going to be inevitable as long as Joey B is under center and Jamar is running routes for them. It's just how it goes. Confidence can give you a step up in your game, and these boys do not lack it. The Seahawks will test them this week, and give us a good gauge on if they truly are going to compete this year or not. Maybe they'll be the Bengals we know again, and they'll be shit-talking Kansas City in January again.
3. Chicago Bears
These motherfuckers. Look what happens when you let the OC do his job and the defensive guys focus on defense. You start to look like a football team. Did you know that DJ Moore is fuckin awesome? I knew he was good, but the way he made Washington's secondary his bitch Thursday night was phenomenal. His route running, YAC, all of it seemed picture perfect. Then we have Justin Fields. The man everyone was doubting two weeks ago is showing why he was a first rounder to begin with. Let the man play his type of game! If the Bears keep playing like this, they can just let Carolina keep playing like shit and still have a high first round pick. Maybe actually get some depth to the team rather than restarting every five years? Here's to hoping that the Bears suddenly become competent!
4. Atlanta Falcons
Why the hell hasn't Desmond Ridder been doing that every week? He should just always throw well, they would probably win a lot more that way. Also, did you know Kyle Pitts was still in the NFL? No, seriously, he's there. They actually used buddy on Sunday, and he might have a chance to play like a first rounder if they keep throwing to him. I am not super high on this team, but the adjustment they made from one week to the next cannot be ignored. Also, Bijan Robinson is still him. That boy has consistently made defenders look ridiculous week in and week out. He gon' be special in this league. Let's see how they do against Washington this week, and if Desmond Ridder decides to embrace the gunslinging mentality to put some points on the board.
On The Mend
1. Minnesota Vikings
Luck is officially no longer on the side of Minnesota. Those one score games are starting to bite them in the ass, hard. Looks like they're starting to pay their end of the deal with the devil. They more than likely made said deal behind Kirk's back, because he's still balling out (see my blog for my takes on that guy). Justin Jefferson is on IR. That's shitty. Anyways, the defense continues to show that they do not prefer to play well when it comes time. It's the Chiefs, I know, but Minnesota at least had the offensive talent to compete. But Patty and the boys bent 'em over on the other side of the ball, and it looks like Kevin O'Connell is going to have to hard restart this team, and not save any progress when the screen prompts up. Leave Kirk, it's okay, take a lil' vacay from the Midwest and find a new winter getaway spot (Hello Tennessee? It's Fax. From SportsFax? No? Ok, well I have a proposal for ya'll if you want to win more).
2. New England Patriots
Good news here is that the Raiders don't even have to show up on Sunday. Seriously, the Patriots will just beat themselves for you. If Josh McDaniels just put two scarecrows with buckets around their necks in the secondary, Mac Jones would still have at least two interceptions. But what about offense for the Raiders? Three roombas and duct tape. Honestly though, the Patriots look like the worst team in the league, and Bill Belichick's stubbornness of sticking to this game plan is not going to get them wins anytime soon. But who knows, maybe he's been cooking in the office this week and we're about to see Mac Jones go off and skull-fuck the Raiders. Stranger things have happened.
3. New York Giants
Brian Daboll is a good coach. He is. Daniel Jones is not a good quarterback. He is not. Now that he might be out with an injury, maybe the veteran experience of Tyrod Taylor can do something on Sunday. Who are they playing again? Oh.. never mind then. Yeah, things are not looking up for these guys, it's probably tank for Caleb Williams time. Like, legitimately for this team. What about Daniel Jones and all that money? Have you seen the dude run? Put that boy in the receiver corps, fuck it. Terrelle Pryor 2.0 coming your way Fall 2024.
4. Carolina Panthers
On the mend would be putting it lightly. I think the o-line either hates Bryce Young or has a hit out on him. He's getting dog-walked every week, and the offense has absolutely no life. The Lions literally toyed with them last week, just to kind of make it look like a professional football game. Frank Reich looks like Frank Reich, I'm not surprised at all there. Bryce Young is definitely not the problem though. They need an o-line, and they need a WR1 under the age of 30. They could just draft one! Oh shit, that's right, they gave up that pick AND their star receiver. Oh boy.
Don't be taking this list as gospel, although I don't really expect that to happen because I don't have a cool title like "ESPN Analyst" after my name. Also, my home page literally says this is opinion-based. Who knows, though? Maybe all of this will remain to be true come Sunday and I'll start putting "Analyst" after my name too. And if it doesn't go well, we will all collectively pretend that last sentence was never typed.
Twitter (X): @TimothyFax
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